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1 Peter 3:7
“Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.”
Having addressed the responsibility of Christian wives to submit to their own husbands (1 Peter 3:1–6), Peter next deals with the duty of husbands toward their wives. In today’s verse, we learn the specific way that husbands are to exercise their authority over their wives.
Let us start midway through 1 Peter 3:7, where the Apostle gives the theological basis for his instruction—namely, that wives are “heirs with [their husbands] of the grace of life.” As we said in an earlier study, this statement indicates that God’s order of authority and submission in the home is not grounded in the inherent superiority or inferiority of either man or woman. Both believing husbands and wives will inherit the fullness of resurrected life in the new heavens and earth—the final grace that we will receive when Christ returns—so they have equal worth in God’s sight (1:13; see 2 Peter 3:13). This equality creates a mutuality in the relationship wherein we see that while the wife has a duty to her husband to submit to his authority, the husband also has a duty to his wife.
The duty of the husband to his wife is to exercise his authority in their relationship in a godly and loving way. Christian husbands are to live with their wives “in an understanding way” (1 Peter 3:7). Husbands are to understand what God requires of them and to understand their wives’ personalities and desires so that they can lead with kindness and godly authority. In particular, a husband must honor his wife, remembering that the woman is “the weaker vessel.” Peter is referring to physical strength here, not saying that women are somehow emotionally or spiritually weaker than men. Generally, men are physically larger and stronger than women, and they can use that strength to bully and intimidate their wives. They must not do so. Husbands are to be kind without being pushovers, to respect and esteem their wives and their needs and desires. John Calvin comments, “Nothing destroys the friendship of life more than contempt; nor can we really love any but those whom we esteem; for love must be connected with respect.”
Christian marriages are to be characterized by mutual respect and love, and as the leader in the home, the husband has the responsibility of fostering this by not mistreating his wife. Blessed is the husband who is grateful for receiving a prudent wife from the Lord and makes that clear to others (Prov. 19:14).
Coram Deo Living before the face of God
First Peter 3:7 also says that husbands are to live with their wives in an understanding way so that their prayers are not hindered. Prayers can be hindered by wrong motivations, by not thinking well of one’s spouse, or by being distracted by sin. Loving our spouses affects our relationship with God.
For further study
- Ruth 2–3
- 1 Corinthians 5:1–7
- Ephesians 5:25–33
- Colossians 3:19
The bible in a year
- 2 Kings 10–11
- John 5:30–47