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2 Samuel 13:1–14
After this Absalom the son of David had a lovely sister, whose name was Tamar; and Amnon the son of David loved her (v. 1).
David has defeated the Ammonites, effectively ending his foreign conquests. Israel is now in a period of peace, at least in terms of warfare. But David’s personal peace does not last long. Rather, the ” ‘adversity … from [David’s] own house’ ” (12:11) that God promised as a consequence of his sin now begins to manifest itself.
The trouble begins with David’s oldest son, Amnon (3:2). We’re told that Amnon falls in love with Tamar, the sister of his half-brother Absalom, David’s third son (3:3). But the author of 2 Samuel quickly shows that this is not love at all. Our text says Amnon is “distressed” over Tamar because she is a virgin and because “it was improper for Amnon to do anything to her.” In short, Amnon is in lust, not love; he is only interested in the “lovely” Tamar’s body. So great is Amnon’s distress that he begins to lose weight. His cousin Jonadab, David’s nephew, soon notices and inquires about it, and Amnon confides in him. A true Israelite, upon hearing this, ought to rebuke Amnon for his completely improper thoughts. But Jonadab does no such thing. He is described as “a very crafty man,” and he designs a way for Amnon to take advantage of David’s indulgent love for his children to get Tamar under his power. All goes according to plan and Tamar innocently comes to nurse her half-brother. She makes cakes just as he asks, then brings them to his bedside to feed him. Curiously, he has dismissed his servants, but she suspects nothing. “Her chaste and virtuous soul has not the least thought of that which his polluted breast is full of,” Matthew Henry writes.
Suddenly, Amnon seizes Tamar, reveals his intentions, and invites her to participate in his wickedness, but she puts up a fight and tries her best to dissuade him. She declares that she will not willingly submit to him because incest is outlawed among God’s people (Lev. 18:9; 20:17); it is a “disgraceful” thing. She warns him that premarital sexual relations will “shame” her and will mark him as a “fool,” causing him to lose esteem in Israel. And (perhaps grasping for any tactic she can devise) she even suggests that David may prove so indulgent as to allow Amnon to have her as his wife if he only will ask their father. But Amnon will not listen to any of her protests, and he assaults her.
Coram Deo Living before the face of God
Tamar’s innocence is touching but tragic. Jesus told His disciples to be as innocent as doves, but also to be as wise as serpents (Matt. 10:16). We are called to engage the world with courage as well as a degree of caution, for we are sheep among wolves. Ponder how you can grow in these virtues and help other believers do the same.
For Further Study
- 1 Chron. 12:32
- 1 Cor. 14:20
- Eph. 5:15
- Phil. 2:14–15