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John 13 reads like a scene out of a classic whodunit mystery novel. Twelve disciples assemble for the Passover meal. Jesus is deeply troubled in His spirit. Into what should have been a loving, celebratory atmosphere, Jesus makes a shocking announcement: “Truly, truly, I say to you, one of you will betray me” (v. 21). One of Jesus’ closest friends will betray Him? Never! John asks, “Lord, who is it?” (v. 25). Can you imagine the suspense? Instead of saying his name, Jesus simply gives a morsel of bread to Judas and bids him to do what he has planned to do. Satan enters Judas, and he leaves the upper room (vv. 26–30). The disciples are clueless about what is really going on. They probably couldn’t comprehend one of their own turning against their beloved Teacher.
Into this tense relational climate Jesus delivers one of His most important instructions to His disciples:
“Little children, yet a little while I am with you. You will seek me, and just as I said to the Jews, so now I also say to you, ‘Where I am going you cannot come.’ A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” (vv. 33–35)
This monumental betrayal by Judas left just a short time for Jesus to be with His closest followers. He would soon be crucified for the sins of His people. What more needed to be said? A commandment to love one another. Judas demonstrated hatred not only for Jesus but for the disciples of Jesus as well. This commandment is what disciples of Jesus, past and present, desperately need to be reminded of every day.
a new commandment?
But there is something puzzling about Jesus’ commandment, isn’t there? He claims that this command is something “new.” Of course, Jesus knew that the command to love other people is as old as the beginning of the world (1 John 3:11). What is so new about this commandment? The key to understanding its newness is in the phrase “just as I have loved you” (John 13:34). Jesus commanded our love for one another to be all about Him and not about us. As His disciples, we are to love with His love in our hearts and minds. We are to live in the love of Jesus as we live out the love of Jesus to other people. His love is the pattern for true, godly love for one another as believers.
We know that Jesus Christ makes all things new. So it makes sense that He makes our love for one another new as well. Without Jesus, our love for others can become too self-centered, seeking recognition, reciprocation, or a response that is pleasing to us. Without Jesus, our love can also become too others-focused. It can be defined merely by what others want or think they need from us. It can be more about people-pleasing than pleasing God. Loving others without having the love of Christ will produce a love that essentially looks like the world’s various versions of love.
The Apostle John also speaks repeatedly about Jesus’ new commandment. In 1 John 4:7–8, he frames it like this: “Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.” As Christians, we can love others only because we are first loved by God. We are His beloved children. Loving others demonstrates that we know God. And as Jesus puts it, it shows that we are His disciples. This new commandment is born solely out of the new life that we have in Christ.
“one another” connections
Saul, known later as Paul, had absolutely no love for the disciples of Jesus, as demonstrated by his dogged persecution of them. His remarkable conversion to Christ produced not only a new life of love for Jesus but a new love for those who followed Jesus. This connection of love for God and love for other Christians is crystallized in each of his New Testament letters to churches and individuals. He repeatedly writes about the importance of love in all types of Christian relationships: Jew and Greek, husband and wife, parent and child, slave and free, and so on. Just as Jesus taught about loving one another, a relationship with Him must produce right relationships with His followers as well.
Paul was very fond of using “one another” language when highlighting the essential responsibilities that Christians have to each other. Many of these are connected to and build on Christ’s central command to love one another. Consider just a sampling of these commands: Disciples of Jesus are to outdo one another in showing honor (Rom. 12:10), build up one another (14:19), care for one another (1 Cor. 12:25), serve one another (Gal. 5:13), forgive one another (Eph. 4:32), and be patient and bear with one another (Col. 3:13). These and many other “one another” commands help us learn exactly what loving one another in a Christ-centered way looks like.
In his letter to the church at Colossae, Paul makes the connection of the “one another” commands to loving one another even clearer:
Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. (Col. 3:12–14)
Love for one another is what connects other virtues, such as compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, patience, forbearance, and forgiveness. This passage echoes 1 Corinthians 13, the quintessential chapter on what love for God and other people looks like. When we have doubts about what it means to love other people, we have Paul’s letters to give us clarity. Paul, like John, knew that Christians’ loving one another is the necessary result of believing the gospel of Jesus Christ.
So why is it often such a challenge for Christians to love one another? It seems like being loved by God and having the love of Christ in us would make it fairly easy to love other believers. The simple answer is “sin.” But the more precise answer is that our sinful hearts, Satan, and this world tempt us to focus on everything that is less important than Christ. We can get caught up so easily in the differences that we have with other Christians—differences of personality, culture, interests, concerns, priorities, and so on. And yes, we can let our theological differences fuel our dislike as well. Add to that all the real relational hurts from others, and we have plenty of reasons not to love one another as Christ commands. We desperately need reminders to make our love for others all about Jesus and not ourselves.
all people will know
The new commandment to love one another just as Jesus loves us comes with a surprising end goal: “By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:35). It wouldn’t be long before Jesus would send out these remaining disciples to be His Apostles. They would be responsible to preach, teach, and bear witness to the truth. Yet Jesus tells them that it will be their love for one another that will communicate the loudest. People will know and become convinced of authentic Christianity by its love.
So as important as orthodox theology, sound teaching, and vital church ministries are, the world is also watching how Christians treat each other. The Apostle Paul took Jesus’ words to heart, putting it this way: “If I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing” (1 Cor. 13:2). Our witness depends on our relationship to other Christians. Do we believe this? If we do, we all have work to do.
I often tell the couples I counsel that the best gift they can offer their children is a Christ-centered, loving marriage. This truth is a direct application of Christ’s new commandment to His disciples. By extension, the best gift that we can offer all people of this world is the love of Jesus. Our charge is to love one another in front of a watching world—with His love and in His love. If we truly want to show the lost what disciples of Christ look like, then we must be the most loving people they have ever seen, by the grace and love of God for us.